The Healing Illusion: Are We Being Emotionally Scammed?

6 Minutes Read

A recent trend on social media ought to concern us all. Everywhere you scroll, there’s a reel promising instant happiness, quick healing, or “mindset shifts” that claim to fix deep-seated emotional issues in the blink of an eye. 

These videos aren’t by trained mental health professionals, but a new crop of self-proclaimed “mind coaches,” “happiness coaches,” and “emotional sales coaches.” Titles vary, but their message is always the same: think positive, stay strong, and everything will fall into place. This article is not about targeting such individuals, but rather a general reflection on this growing trend and the concerns it raises within the broader mental health community.

The Danger of Oversimplifying Healing: When Love Isn’t Enough

Feel-good advice often goes like this: “Love is the answer to everything,” “Just spread love,” or “Say something kind, and you’ll change someone’s life.” These messages sound warm, comforting, and even inspiring at first glance. And to be fair, love is indeed powerful. It can heal, create connection, foster empathy, and give people strength during difficult times.

But the truth no one talks about is that love has to be healthy to help. Life is far more complex than these neatly packaged motivational slogans suggest. Love, by itself, cannot fix every wound. Some hurts need more than affection; they need boundaries, safe spaces, therapy, systemic change, and even justice. And not everyone experiences love in the same way. Many people don’t even have access to safe or healthy expressions of love.

Not everyone can hug their parents or say “I love you” without fear or shame. Some people do not feel safe or even accepted in their own homes. For a woman whose husband regularly slaps her, will a hug fix that? For a child who faces constant rejection or abuse at home, will saying “I love you” suddenly make everything better?

A young girl once shared her heartbreaking experience. After attending a session conducted by a teen influencer, she was told that if she simply started greeting her parents with a smile and saying salaam regularly, the situation at home would improve. She believed this. She wanted to believe this. But when she tried, her mother slapped her for doing it. She was left not just hurt, but confused and guilty. She started blaming herself, thinking she must be cursed, thinking something was wrong with her. That feeling of shame still haunts her.

Are Certifications Always a Sign of Trust? Not Really

Many people believe that if someone has a certification, especially from abroad, and years of experience, they must be trustworthy. But that’s not always true. Just having a certificate doesn’t mean someone’s advice is good, safe, or right for everyone. Experience also doesn’t guarantee quality. It’s also important to ask: what are they certified in? Who gave them that certificate? Do they follow any ethical rules? If they can’t explain their methods clearly, then their “certification” might just be a marketing trick to look more professional.

Then comes the issue of accountability. Many of these influencers or coaches carry no professional training in mental health, trauma care, or even basic counseling ethics. Yet, they advise thousands, sometimes millions, on matters like depression, PTSD, and healing from abuse. Sharing your healing journey doesn’t necessarily qualify someone to guide others through theirs. Without understanding psychological safety or ethical boundaries, their advice can easily slip from harmless inspiration to dangerous misinformation.

Another concerning pattern is the shift towards emotional marketing over genuine healing. Influencers know what triggers emotions, so they package content to make you feel inspired, hopeful, or guilty enough to buy their courses or return for more. It’s a business model. However, healing isn’t a commodity; it’s a personal, slow, and often painful process.

More subtle harm is done by creating false hope and inducing guilt. When someone hears repeatedly that their healing depends solely on their mindset or their ability to “manifest” positivity, it places the entire burden of recovery on the individual. If they don’t improve, the unspoken message is: you’re not trying hard enough. This can lead to overwhelming guilt and self-blame. Instead of feeling supported, they feel like failures in their healing. Ultimately, such narratives often lead to the silencing of genuine conversations. Life is not always about gratitude journals and vision boards. People go through pain that needs to be acknowledged, not bypassed.

These days, spirituality also often turns into a performance. People use soft music, tearful expressions, and random spiritual phrases to create an emotional atmosphere, building an aura that makes them look wise or deeply connected. But, to restate the obvious, sounding spiritual doesn’t always mean being spiritual.

Life Isn’t a Race, And You Don’t Always Need to Be “Fixed”

Why do these ‘Influencers’ keep asking others to chase after life, to keep running, achieving, and competing all the time? That’s not healthy at all. Life isn’t meant to be a constant race. The truth is, we can’t find solutions to everything. Some parts of life are just hard, and that’s okay. As human beings, it’s normal to feel a range of emotions; to be mad, sad, angry, happy, to cry, to feel lost sometimes. That’s part of being human. 

When someone is going through a hard time, it’s important to listen deeply and give them your full attention without interrupting or rushing to fix things. Often, just being heard can be healing. It helps to validate their feelings by saying things like, “That sounds tough,” or “I can understand why you feel that way,” which shows you care and accept their emotions. Instead of jumping in with quick advice or judgment, it’s usually better to stay with them in their feelings unless they specifically ask for help. You can gently ask questions like, “Do you want to talk more about it?” or “Is there any way I can support you?” so they feel safe and empowered to share as much or as little as they want. Offering support doesn’t always mean giving solutions; sometimes, helping them figure out what they want or what steps to take next is more helpful. It’s also important to respect their boundaries; if they’re not ready to talk or need space, honor that without pressure.

Women’s Silent Struggles: What They’re Searching For 

Women are often the main target of these ‘Life coaching businesses’ for a reason. Many women feel emotionally unsupported in their homes and relationships; their needs are often overlooked in a society shaped by patriarchy, where they’re expected to nurture others but rarely receive care themselves. This constant emotional neglect makes them vulnerable to promises of healing, self-worth, and independent. It’s this silent need that influencers often tap into. Whether it’s through courses in acupuncture, healing therapies, or mindset coaching, what they’re selling is a sense of purpose and belonging, something many women feel they’re missing in their daily lives.